Elopement Ceremonies + Vows
Ceremony ideas and vow templates for elopements and micro weddings
Officiants
My eloping couples either conduct their ceremony themselves (simplest option), choose someone close to them to officiate (most special option), or hire a professional (most structured and experienced option).
If you do choose to conduct your ceremony yourself, you will still need an ordained person to sign your marriage license. This can be done by either a) legally getting married at the courthouse with a government official signing your marriage license or b) having an ordained person at your wedding (me, your photographer, for example!)
Different states have different officiant requirements, so read up on that before you decide who (if anyone) will officiate your wedding! Colorado is exceedingly excellent for elopements in this way because no officiant or witnesses are technically needed for a valid marriage license.
If you don't want to think too much about your ceremony and want the guidance of a professional, I can assist with sourcing local officiants for your ceremony!
Ceremony ideas
Here are some ceremony traditions you can consider!
Unity ceremonies: sharing beer/wine/whiskey, planting a tree in a pot together, combining sand or soil into a vessel, etc. Remember to follow Leave No Trace!
Readings: religious verses, poems, excerpts from your favorite books, etc
Hand-fasting: this is a beautifully ancient tradition that can be done with just the two of you
Family/community involvement: if you have guests at your wedding, you can have them step in for readings or blessings. If you are eloping without guests, you can have family and friends send in letters or gifts
Micro wedding ceremony logistics
Your ceremony is more than showing up to say your vows and rings. Let’s think through some logistics together!
Will you be sitting or standing? Do any of your older guests or guests with disabilities need to be seated? Most importantly, does your ceremony site allow chairs? Most public land sites forbid chairs, though exceptions can usually be made for folks who can’t be on their feet long.
How would you like your guests arranged around you? Typically, half moons work best, but I’ve also seen rows and clusters on either side.
Will you be walking down the aisle? If so, how? With each other, with parents, or alone?
Will you be walking up the aisle after the ceremony for a private moment? Or staying with your guests?
Who will holds your vows and rings until you’re ready for them? If you have flowers, who will you pass them off to?
Vows
There are plenty of vow templates available to you online, but the best vows are written with your words in your voice. Writing vows may feel intimidating, but even if you're not a strong writer, you are a strong lover.
Here are some snippets you can include.
your favorite qualities of your partner
how your partner has made you a better person
favorite memories from your relationship
when you knew you were going to marry them
things you're excited for in your marriage
and, most importantly,
your promises to not just the partner in front of you today, but the partner you first met, the partner who will raise a family with you, the parter you’ll go through wonderful and terrifying times with, and the partner you’ll grow old with.
While phones are more convenient, I highly, highly recommend writing your vows on paper or in customized vow books. Looking back on your wedding photos 15 years from now with 2020s technology in your hands will be a little funny, and more importantly, you can frame your handwritten vows as a keepsake!
micro weddings — private vows
Even with a small wedding, saying your heart's true words with your entire family (and your honey's entire family) listening can be intimidating!
This is where private vows come in. You can keep your main ceremony sweet and simple, and pour your heart out in private. We can do private vows after your private first look, or you can choose to do them later in the day.
Love the idea of private vows but want to keep it more laidback? Try writing heartfelt letters to each other instead!
The Marriage License
I actually have a separate post about this since it can be a bit more in depth. Read about how to obtain, sign, and return your Colorado Marriage License here! For ceremony purposes, you can decide if you want to sign your marriage license during your ceremony or afterward, and who you want to sign your marriage license with you!