Elopement vs Micro Wedding
The difference between an elopement and a micro wedding and which one may be best for you
the impact of having guests
The word “elopement” gets tossed around a whole lot in the wedding world, and it can be confusing because each couple and vendor has a different definition for it. Some consider a wedding with 20 guests an elopement.
Personally, since guests can drastically change your elopement plans, I consider an elopement to be a wedding with just the two of you, but I don’t want you to fear you’re not eloping if you’re considering bringing a friend, loved one, or helper to your elopement. For example:
if you're bringing your dogs or other pets to your elopement, someone to help take care of them is always beneficial
are you having a friend or family member marry you two? perfect! bring them along.
So long as they are 100% down to hike with you, drive with you, and do whatever it takes to keep your elopement dream alive, they are welcome to come and help. We'll probably part ways at some point so we can focus on couples photos with just the two of you.
So many of my couples choose to elope for the privacy and freedom of having a guest-free wedding. With all that being said, I'm very close to my family and believe you can have the best of both worlds: spending an intentional, quiet day with just your honey, but including your family in your celebration.
Here's how you can do that…
During your elopement:
Read letters from your loved ones, open gifts from loved ones, or bring photos of them to your ceremony site.
Is there a wedding tradition in either of your families? How can you incorporate it into your elopement day?
FaceTime them at any point in the day, or even set your phone up on a tripod so they can experience your ceremony with you
After your elopement:
Throwing a reception after your elopement is a great way to celebrate with your loved ones without worrying about the complications on your actual elopement day.
A few options for celebrations after:
elope in the morning, then spend the afternoon and evening with friends and family
spend the day or a few days with just the two of you, like a lil honeymoon, and then celebrate with your family once you return home
elope and spend the day together, then have an intimate wedding with your loved ones the next day!
Want to know my favorite option? Organize a reception down the road to celebrate your one month or one year anniversary. At this point, you'll have your photos back, and you can play them for your loved ones in a slideshow!
Should you have an elopement or micro wedding?
This greatly depends on your preferences, elopement ideas, and relationship with family and friends. Here’s some general guidance based on my own experience and what I’ve witnessed with other couples.
When you should have an elopement
When the idea of saying your vows in front of anyone, even close friends and family, feels terrifying and invasive (side note: if this is the only thing holding you back, you can opt for private vows instead)
When having guests will seriously impede your plans for your elopement (hiking, outdoors activities, travel, etc)
When a family member or guest will actively take you out of the moment (no amount of family obligation is worth the regret of having someone at your wedding that you don’t feel emotionally safe with, or who will remove you from your joy)
When you should have a micro wedding
When the idea of your family members or close friends not being present for your ceremony makes you feel sad
When you’d prefer a multi-day experience with loved ones rather than just the two of you
When you want to feel celebrated in the moment by people you know and love